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Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Halloween On the Rise
And I would just want to point out some RIDICULOUS costumes I found while searching for my own. Here is a list of the top ten i have found, since women's costumes only come in size sexy. And yes. These are ALL REAL:
10. Snookie
Already far from a celebrity, her only attribute is to be annoying. When I saw this, I died laughing. It got the poof pretty much on point, though.
9. Red Hot Pirate Wench Adult Plus Size
This has no real purpose, but I have heard many of my girlfriends say that they want to be a pirate. I just hope its not this one. On the bright side, kudos to her plastic surgeon.
8. Wizard of Oz Cowardly Lioness
Looks like she got her courage
7. Iron Man 2 Iron Woman
Now I'm no expert, but last time i checked, Iron man had a penis...
6. Sexy Snow White
There goes my childhood.
5. Sexy Nurse
This list wouldn't be complete without a nurse to take our temperature. Who of course has a coating of lipgloss on as well. Sexy.
4. Dr. Annita Hardwon
Okay. I'll be childish and say this only made the list because of the name. Its pretty catchy though.
The list is coming to a close!!!
3. Red Lace
No theme. No clothes. Just a body stocking. This is what some consider a costume. Happy Haloween.
2. Zebra
At least this costume sort of has a theme. I'm impressed.
and.......
DRUMROLL PLEASE
The costume that caught my eye the most and was the reason for this list:
1. Sexy Nemo
You have single handedly ruined me you pixar rip off! Here's a bit of the description that had me in a mixture of bafflement and flat out crying in pitty:
Can i also give a sidenote and say it is photoshop at its best with that kick ass calf muscle?
There you have it. Halloween for the females out there. Get yo ass this holiday season!
-T
10. Snookie
Already far from a celebrity, her only attribute is to be annoying. When I saw this, I died laughing. It got the poof pretty much on point, though.
9. Red Hot Pirate Wench Adult Plus Size
This has no real purpose, but I have heard many of my girlfriends say that they want to be a pirate. I just hope its not this one. On the bright side, kudos to her plastic surgeon.
8. Wizard of Oz Cowardly Lioness
Looks like she got her courage
7. Iron Man 2 Iron Woman
Now I'm no expert, but last time i checked, Iron man had a penis...
6. Sexy Snow White
There goes my childhood.
5. Sexy Nurse
This list wouldn't be complete without a nurse to take our temperature. Who of course has a coating of lipgloss on as well. Sexy.
4. Dr. Annita Hardwon
Okay. I'll be childish and say this only made the list because of the name. Its pretty catchy though.
The list is coming to a close!!!
3. Red Lace
No theme. No clothes. Just a body stocking. This is what some consider a costume. Happy Haloween.
2. Zebra
At least this costume sort of has a theme. I'm impressed.
and.......
DRUMROLL PLEASE
The costume that caught my eye the most and was the reason for this list:
1. Sexy Nemo
You have single handedly ruined me you pixar rip off! Here's a bit of the description that had me in a mixture of bafflement and flat out crying in pitty:
Description:
It'll be no wonder why everyone is looking for you in this women's sexy Nemo costume! The unique costume includes a strapless, fitted dress that is made from a nylon and spandex blend. It is orange and white with black accents to resemble Nemo from the popular animated movie and has a small black tutu skirt. Matching leg warmers and elbow fins are also included for a complete look. Both slide easily into place and the elbow fins feature a black, velvet-like fin. You'll be ready to dive deep into the ocean when you add our black hot pants!
Can i also give a sidenote and say it is photoshop at its best with that kick ass calf muscle?
There you have it. Halloween for the females out there. Get yo ass this holiday season!
-T
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Liar Liar
A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and asked, "May I see your driver's license?"
The driver answered, "I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI."
The officer asked, "May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?"
The driver answered,"It's not my car. I stole it."
The officer asked, "The car is stolen?"
The driver answered, "That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there."
The officer asked, "There's a gun in the glove box?"
The driver answered, "Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk."
The officer asked, "There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?"
The driver answered, "Yes, sir."
Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by! police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation.
The Captain asked, "Sir, can I see your license?" The driver answered, "Sure. Here it is." It was valid.
The Captain asked, "Who's car is this?"
The driver answered, "It's mine, officer. Here's the owner' card." The driver owned the car.
The Captain asked, "Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?"
The driver answered, "Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it." Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.
The Captain asked, "Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it."
The driver answered, "No problem." Trunk is opened; no body.
The Captain said, "I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk."
The driver answered, "Yeah, I'll bet the lying s.o.b. told you I was speeding, too!"
The driver answered, "I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI."
The officer asked, "May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?"
The driver answered,"It's not my car. I stole it."
The officer asked, "The car is stolen?"
The driver answered, "That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there."
The officer asked, "There's a gun in the glove box?"
The driver answered, "Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk."
The officer asked, "There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?"
The driver answered, "Yes, sir."
Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by! police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation.
The Captain asked, "Sir, can I see your license?" The driver answered, "Sure. Here it is." It was valid.
The Captain asked, "Who's car is this?"
The driver answered, "It's mine, officer. Here's the owner' card." The driver owned the car.
The Captain asked, "Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?"
The driver answered, "Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it." Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.
The Captain asked, "Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it."
The driver answered, "No problem." Trunk is opened; no body.
The Captain said, "I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk."
The driver answered, "Yeah, I'll bet the lying s.o.b. told you I was speeding, too!"
Monday, October 18, 2010
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Monday, October 11, 2010
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Monday, October 4, 2010
World's Tiniest Church
On a wooden dock in a pond near Syracuse, New York, sits a teeny-tiny church. The pint-sized house of worship was built in 1989, and is just 3 feet by 6 feet and has only two seats. There are no regular services, but Cross Island Chapel is available for special occasions, like a 1990 wedding in which guests had to sit in boats outdoors. Address: Sconondoa Road, Oneida, New York
Photo courtesy of Martin Beales.
Photo courtesy of Martin Beales.
Cadillac Ranch
This installation art, which features 10 graffiti-covered cars that look like they took a nosedive into the soil, was developed in 1974 by millionaire Stanley Marsh III and a trio of architects. If you're planning to be in the area, be sure to pack a can of spray paint: Visitors are encouraged to add their own artistic adornments to the vehicles. Address: I-40, Amarillo, Texas
World's Largest Hammost
Beer Can House
In 1968, John Milkovisch, a retired upholsterer, began a very unique home improvement project; he started by inlaying marbles, rocks and metal pieces to replace the grass in his yard, then moved on to adding aluminum beer can siding to the exterior of his house. Now the home is completely encrusted in an estimated 50,000 beer cans and open to the public for viewing. Address: 222 Malone Street, Houston, Texas
Sunday, October 3, 2010
See? This is exactly why English is so hard to LEARN!
Why Foreigners Have Trouble With English
And you wonder why foreigners have trouble with the English language. (From Pat Brentani of the Boston BBS.)- The bandage was wound around the wound.
- The farm was used to produce produce.
- The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
- He could lead if he would get the lead out.
- The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
- Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
- A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
- When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
- A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
- The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
- There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
- They were too close to the door to close it.
- The buck does funny things when the does are present.
- To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
- The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
- After a number of injections my jaw got number.
- Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
- I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
- How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
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